Why My Church And I Need Feminism: The Women On Your Worship Team

I happen to be a woman who plays drums professionally. I also happen to have the privilege of serving many church bands through a local network that organizes teams to meet their needs.

Over the years, I have learned to laugh off a lot of ignorant comments such as “You’re a girl and you play drums? That’s so hardcore” and “You’re pretty good for a girl” . . . the subtext here being that being female is a handicap to my drumming ability or that playing the instrument that I love is not a suitable activity because I’m a female. I’m used to being introduced at bar and restaurant gigs as “our drummer . . . she’s hot” or “the chick drummer.” Male musicians get to be introduced to the crowd according to their skill or something about them (“he rocks,” “he shreds,” “he’s from Atlanta, Georgia”), but my identity is reduced to my body and my gender.

I have hope that worship music can be a space transcendent of these value systems, and can resonate with the acceptance and sacrificial love of a God who has no gender bias. I have found that often, it isn’t, and it doesn’t. Last week while playing in a church I’d never visited before, a gentleman on the worship team approached me and asked me if I have “anger issues.” The “you-must-be-angry-because-you-play-drums” jokes continued along with inappropriate comments such as “I feel sorry for your boyfriend,” etc. While I get that the point of the joke is that I must be angry because I hit things to play my instrument, it is clear to me that a man would never be on the receiving end of such statements (“I feel sorry for your girlfriend,” and so forth). He was more or less saying that drumming is too aggressive an activity for a woman (perhaps I should find a knitting circle to join instead).

Church folk tend to get really freaked out by the word “feminism,” and I’ve heard many pastors try to argue that the church doesn’t need feminism because “God doesn’t need feminism.” And half of that argument is absolutely right: God DOESN’T need feminism. He sees us for who we are; he has no gender bias. But the catastrophic mistake being made here is the presumption that WE don’t need feminism. WE do. WE need a way of thinking that dismantles the value systems of our society, which have taught us that women are objects, and that their worth is rooted in appearances and identity performances. Exposing these lies and the damage they have done to us is at the heart of feminism. Freedom from the destructive ideologies of the world is at the heart of God. In short, we are on the same side.

 I have also found that as a woman on a worship team (and this is very much my own personal experience, rather than a generalization), I am often expected to have a bubbly, over-the-top personality all the time. While I always do my best to be friendly, welcoming, and professional, I have a fairly introverted personality (especially when I’m loading out drums at 5 a.m. on a Sunday!). I have been in many situations in which male musicians are allowed to be who they are and do their jobs in peace, while I am pegged as “angry” or “unfriendly.” I try to always allow the joy I experience while making music shine in my actions and presence, but this doesn’t seem to be enough. Apparently, Christian women are expected to be some kind of perpetually enthusiastic, garrulous cheerleader ALIENS. (The subtext here is that all women must share the same personality traits / be ridiculously emotional.) I also find that leaders and employers don’t take me as seriously as they do a male drummer of my skill level when discussing contracts, money, business, and so on, in the music world. To my leaders and employers that have treated me with respect and professionalism, I notice, and I appreciate you. But you should not be the exception in my experiences, and this is why I write.

These are the patronizations I encounter every day. This is why I need feminism--so that I can share my passion and love in worship and keep hoping for a day where playing music won’t coincide with being humiliated and treated like a circus act. So that I can do my job with professionalism and excellence. And this is why my church needs feminism, too—so that our sisters and daughters can freely answer their callings and use their gifts and talents for the glory of God and the edification of the body of Christ.